Setting Structure in September
Summer is wrapping up and the school-year is kicking off, in fact many families are already back to school!. Here in the Northeast, my kids go back in early September after the Labor Day holiday. I am trying to soak up every last minute of the summer slowdown but am also feeling the pressure (may I even add anxiety) of the upcoming school year. I will have a second grader, first grader and a brand new pre-schooler (cue the tears).
It is completely normal for things to loosen up in the summer – in my house, bedtime has gotten later, mornings are slower and our routines have lost their predictability. With September quickly approaching, I know we need to get things back in order.
Here are 5 things I’m doing to set structure in my home this September!
Discussing expectations
Establishing our “daily wake time”
Resetting our bedtime routine
Encouraging proactive and independent behaviors
Using visual charts and checklists
Let’s dig into these a little more …
1. Discussing expectations
I firmly believe in the power of a conversation. I can’t expect my kids to read my mind, so we are going to sit down and have a little family meeting about all the things that are going to be different come September. I’ll use this as a chance to talk through the different routine tweaks, our expectations and show some of the visual and verbal cues we’ll be using.
2. Establishing our “daily wake time”
When school starts, my kids need to rise and shine by 6:40 am so we are out of the house by 7:30 am. This may seem like a dream to some parents but my kids are not morning people and are S L O W! On average during the summer, my kids are typically getting up around 7:30 am, so about a week out from the start of school, I’ll start waking them around 7:00 am in anticipation of school starting. This will also help bedtime get a bit earlier since naturally with summer activities it has gotten pushed later, and later, and later!
3. Resetting our bedtime routine
I’m a sleep consultant, so obviously bedtime routines are important to me. We still have structure but have lost some of our predictability. We are still doing all of my non-negotiable hygiene elements – every night my kids bathe or shower, brush teeth, potty, etc.. but our sequence of things, the timing and the role of television has loosened a lot.
Leading up to September, we are refreshing our use of the Hatch light and using the verbal and visual cue to signal it’s time to go upstairs to get ready for bed. Around 7:00 pm, the Hatch light will turn to the rainbow light and a lullaby and that is our verbal and visual cue meaning it’s time to segway upstairs for bathtime. We are working to eliminate transitions, so once we go upstairs, we’ll plan to stay up there and will eliminate coming back downstairs for TV. This is especially important for Declan who is younger and needs more sleep than the older girls!
4. Encouraging proactive and independent behaviors
Four kids to two parents means we need everyone to step up! It’s easy to get into the habit of doing things for them but establishing proactive and independent behaviors pays off long term (even if it is taxing on my patience). We are going to be working on some age appropriate activities that the kids can do independently and proactively to help the back to school transition go smoothly. Examples include putting your shoes on, brushing teeth, putting your water bottle in your bag and so forth.
5. Using visual charts and checklists
We all do better when we have a list of things to do – it takes the guesswork out of our brains! Kids are no different. I will use visual charts and checklists to help with all of the above! There are three check lists I’m using – “morning”, “afterschool” and “evening”. These have simple pictures and words on them to help encourage my kids to get all the things done independently.
A bonus tip:
I am also going to figure out what I can do differently in my own routine now that the schedule is changing. Simple things like creating a system for school work coming home and for separating uniforms more easily because these are the things that send me on edge!
I know regardless of how much preparation we put in there will be a transition period and undoubtedly chaos – it’s just the reality! I will remind myself that kids thrive on structure and clear expectations and with consistency things will click. Afterall, it takes two weeks to form a habit and 21+ days to make it your own – I know we’ll get into a routine, eventually! . Like any change, I’ll give it time, assess frequently to see if there is anything we need to change and give myself grace!
I hope these tips are helpful and if nothing else give you a couple of things to consider for your family. Wishing you a great start to the school year!
Need help with your back to school homework?
We’re here to help you nail a routine that works for your family before the chaos sets in! Don’t hesitate to reach out to A Restful Night for a complimentary consultation call .
Meg O'Leary is an Infant and Child Sleep Expert and the founder of A Restful Night. Based in Westchester County, NY, she leads a team of certified sleep coaches to provide virtual support to families across the US and around the world.
